7 days, 7 chances

I got up this Monday, this is what I said

“Today I am younger than I'll ever be again”

I don't know what tomorrow brings, so now I'll take the chance

to love each other, sing a song, let loose my fears and dance

Chorus: Because today may be the only day I ever get again

              And if I don't do this thing today, then when?

              Today may be the only chance I ever get again

              And if I don't do this thing today, then when?

I got up this Tuesday, this is what I said

“Today I am younger than I'll ever be again”

Today I'll see the best in every other person's eyes

And show I have compassion through whatever tests arise

I got up this Wednesday and this is what I said

“Today I am younger than I'll ever be again”

And so today I promise I will hear before I speak

and listen for the voices of the quiet and the meek

Chorus

I got up this Thursday and this is what I said

“Today I am younger than I'll ever be again”

It's time to let these often silly ancient grudges go

They never served me well and often hurt me still, you know

I got up this Friday and this is what I said

“Today I am younger than I'll ever be again”

And so I shall not make a promise that I cannot keep

Knowing that just as I sow, that I shall also reap

Chorus

I got up this Saturday and this is what I said

“Today I am younger than I'll ever be again”

Today I'll judge not. Today I'll judge not.

Today I'll judge not. Today I'll judge not.

Chorus

I got up this Sunday and this is what I said

“Today I am younger than I'll ever be again”

And I thank God for the last seven days

And fill my heart with gratitude and praise

Chorus x2

Vagabond's Farewell

https://soundcloud.com/freeda-2/vagabond-farewell

Too long a time 'tween me and gone

and my soul collects dust on a shelf

Somehow the road just feels like home

… turns me back into myself

I long for the hum of my tires on the road

And the lure of a brand new view

And since this road just feels like my home

I'll go … with or without you

But how can you ever miss me

If you never let me go

They say if you love me, set me free

If you don't, you'll never know

I long for the feel of my feet on the shore

And the crash of the surf in my ear

I'd love you to come, but since you won't go

I'll kiss you and leave you right here

So I'm up when dawn's on the horizon

And long gone by the time the sun breaks

And nothing but dust in a gentle breeze

by the time you finally awake

Seth and May

She said we put a little something by
For when the days come hard
But as for today, I will sing

He strummed and said there's no gold watch
At the end of thirty years of this
But as for today, I will sing

They sang its easy to die poor these days
Harder to die happy
But that's the kind of work we're willing to do
its easy to die poor these days
Harder to die happy
But that's the kind of work we're willing to do

She looked into his big brown eyes
And sang the song within her heart
And he played his song for her the whole day through

One gold band on her left hand
A silver band on his
They made their love into their music and they gave it to you

Because its easy to die poor these days
Harder to die happy
But that's the kind of work they're willing to do
its easy to die poor these days
Harder to die happy
But that's the kind of work we're willing to do

Providence

A surprise check arrived in the daily mail
And then a brand new bill to pay
I thought the old man'd be upset
Till I overheard him say

"How blessed I am
That the Lord provides
Always in the nick of time
I know that I can count on Him
Ain't Providence divine"

His truck broke down on a dusty road
Coming back home from town
He grinned as the sun broke right through the rain
And picked some flowers on his way, sayin'

"How blessed I am
That the Lord provides
Always in the nick of time
I know that I can count on him
Ain't Providence divine"

His wife was near her mortal end
Full of rising pain and fear
And the Lord he took her life that day
And brought her spirit near

I thought that this would be the day
My friend's faith would lose its light
But he said to me "it was answered prayers
That the Lord ended her fight

How blessed I am
That the Lord provides
Always in the nick of time
I know that I can count on Him
Ain't Providence divine"

Writer's block

Staring at a blank page
Pen in hand, devoid of rage
Or hurt or joy or anything
To write, and maybe later sing

Emotion is a writer's fuel
To just go numb feels rather cruel
Emptiness ain't good for me,
my music, or my poetry

Let go

I'm letting go
Of feeling like I need to know
Which way the dice will roll
I'm releasing all control

Cuz I never had it anyway
Its just another of the games we play
Pretending like we make the rules
Beneath it all we all are fools

The earth still turns
And the sun still burns
Not hastened by my hurry
Or bogged down by my worry

The stars, they stay
way up in the sky
Cuz they're not held there by you or I
(they're not held there by you or I)

Everything
is in its rightful place
Created and sustained by Grace
(Created and sustained by Grace)

So just let go
Of feeling like you need to know
Which way the dice will roll
You can just release control

Cuz you never had it anyway
Its just another of the games we play
Pretending like we make the rules
Beneath it all we all are fools

So just let go

Breathe me in

He reaches for me
in the middle of the night
he's still asleep
and yet he pulls me tight

against his skin
he breathes me in

I used to think
how long can this thing last
but before I blinked
it seems the decades passed

but time moves along
soon he'll be gone
and there's nothing to do
but keep on keeping on

Soon I'll reach for him
in the middle of the night
he won't be there
to sigh and pull me tight

against his skin
or breathe me in

Crazy Talk

I got a restless mind
and a troubled heart
my meds aren't working yet
I wish they'd start

Pills don't work for everybody
but they usually work for me
It keeps the prison of this illness away
and lets me live like I'm free

But every week is different
and no two days are the same
and sometimes there's nothing you can do
but say the meds are to blame

When you got a restless mind
and a troubled heart
and your meds aren't working yet
but you pray they'd start

I made a visit to the doc today
I don't know why, cuz I knew what he'd say
"We gotta get the dose to where it'll work
so you can stop being a jerk"

My reality can be a strange fiction
but I don't have a drug addiction
I do take some but that's okay
Because I only take what the doctors say

But I still got a restless mind
and a troubled heart
my meds aren't working yet
I wish they'd start

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYuFg-GlZJ8

When you fell

You scored some points
for consistency
the lies you told yourself
were the same ones you told me

Now you're asking me to trust
the words upon your tongue
but it doesn't come as easy
as it did when I was young

Maybe it's her age,
that young and pretty, skinny stage
The one in the photo in your email
you tried to delete, but failed

I had you high up on that pedestal
and it hurt me when you fell

One home, one bed
one life to lead
I'm pretty sure that is just what
you and I agreed

when the words I do
were on your tongue
but it seemed a whole lot easier
when we were young

And I have nowhere else to go
cuz that's how marriage is, you know
I had you high up on that pedestal
and it hurt me when you fell

I hope you're done
with your lying
I'm not sure I could take
much more crying

It's time up you give up
that romance
and give our love
another chance

We've been together
since god knows when
and it's hard to tell where you end
and where I begin

I had you high up on that pedestal
and it hurt me when you fell

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OxJACzijzN0

Hello baby

You called me on the phone today
to see if I'd be home
I didn't know just what to say
My time was not my own

I gave what seems like most my life
to make that daily bread
but now that twilight's growing near
I wish that I had said

"Hello baby
I miss you too
I'll be home in just a bit
and tomorrow I'll lie next to you"

I don't know why I stay here still
it's not like we are poor
You earn enough for both of us
no wolves are at our door

You deserve the best of me
not merely what is left of me
and you're my first priority
so babe I'm coming home

Hello baby
I miss you too
I'll be home in just a bit
and tomorrow I'll lie next to you

So call me on the phone today
to see when I'll be home
and I will know just what to say
"Babe, I'm already home"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=znHl7Nb8xwE

Not Yet

Last night I thought it's really gotten bad, and then
I realized it's just the same as it has always been, and it's
probably as good as it will ever get
I'm looking for a silver lining, haven't seen it yet, but go ahead and

Tell me how this too shall pass
Go ahead and tell me how dark days don't last
Tell me again how I'm so strong
And I won't tell you that you're wrong

It's not like I'm afraid to ask for help
with doing things I cannot do for myself
But this ain't laundry or dishes, it ain't feeding the cat
It's waking up and being me and you can't help with that, so go ahead and

Tell me how this too shall pass
Go ahead and tell me how dark days don't last
Tell me again how I'm so strong
And I won't tell you but you're wrong

Right now I thought it's really gotten bad, but then
I realize it's just the same as it has always been, and it's
probably as good as it will ever get
I'm looking for a silver lining, haven't seen it yet
I'm looking for a silver lining, haven't given up yet




Performed by the Muse Collective:  https://soundcloud.com/freeda-2/not-yet

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u-3aP1ZOASM

Sea of pain

My pain isn't something small
That I can just set down
Its much more a roiling sea
In which I'll likely drown

Because I'm too tired to hold on
But too stubborn to let go
And you're the only hope in sight
And you said you'd be my Savior

Then love me to the surface
Adore me till I float
Abide with me while I paddle
The long way to your boat

Throw me a line of compassion
Pull me in before I sink
Inflate my lungs with words of hope
Give my mind with new thoughts to think

I feel the tide, its ebb and flow
I know it means me harm
So wrap me in the safety of
Your ever loving arms

Set sail

There's a scar in the earth
It runs jagged and deep
And the tide is rising
while we sleep

It tears up the carpets,
the walls and the floor
You can't live here no more

No you can't go home

Pull up your anchors,sail into the storm

In search of open waters
Looking for the dawn

Affirm (song with chords)

I am (C) one with the Divine
I am (C7) guided by the Light
I am (F) calm within
and I (C) have clear sight

Of my (C) needs as they appear
and (C7) as they are resolved
that I (F) am secure and safe
and my (C) fears are dissolved

by the (G) current of the (F) Spirit
that (C) runs so deep and (C) strong
I (G) give voice to my (F) gratitude
and (C) wings to my (C) song

I am (G) one with (F) the Di
(C) vine (C)

(G) (F) (C) (C)

(C) Thank you for the journey
As (C7) it has molded me
(F) Now I can move forward
Un (C) burdened, feeling free

My (C) past it cannot harm me
Those (C7) old and dusty scenes
For (F) I have been reborn
I have (C) been washed clean

by the (G) current of the (F) Spirit
that (C) runs so deep and (C) strong
I (G) give voice to my (F) gratitude
and (C) wings to my (C) song
I am (G) one with (F) the Di (C) vine (C)

Quiet guy

He's not a man of many words
No poetry or song
He's kind of an old fashioned guy
Hard working, quiet, strong

You think its hard to know him
But his story's plain to see
This man is not a mystery
His heart's upon his sleeves

He chose to write his stories
Not on paper in a book
He wrote them there upon his arms
Where anyone can look

His stories are like anyone's
Tales of love and pain
Tattooed upon his skin and soul
Inside and outside the same

If a picture's worth a thousand words
Then he's got tons to say
That "quiet guy"
You passed by today.

See the symbols of his kids
They since have grown to teens
As for the big blooming rose
You can't tell what it means

But Rosie was his mama's name
She died when he was young.
And there's the mark of his first true love
From before they came undone

He left a space for his second wife
A saucy little minx
He said he'd put her name right there
But she claims it's a jinx

His stories are like anyone's
Tales of love and pain
Tattooed upon his skin and soul
Inside and outside the same

If a picture's worth a thousand words
Then he's got tons to say
That "quiet guy"
You didn't speak to today.

Prodigal returns

I felt that you
Were lost to me
So made my peace
And set you free

And prayed for you
'Most every day
Since the one
You went away

But now you knock
Upon my door
And I am scared
To hope for more

And so I'll take
It nice and slow
And not push past
How fast you go

For you were lost
And now are found
My prodigal child
Came back around

Into me

Slide into me
Look through my eyes
Try on my skin
Just for size

Work the controls
Behind my face
Choose who I am
For this time, this place

Slide into me
Handle it all
I'll be in the corner
Curled into a ball

Can you make it easy?
Or find happiness?
I was trying for both
But came up with something less

Can you make it easy?
Drive me like a ship
Set my sails
For the next little bit

Slide into me
Handle it all
I'll be in the corner
Curled into a ball

Guru

I saw a Guru on a mountain top
He looked old and calm and wise
But I couldn't get up there with him
Though I swear I tried

But at some point I just stopped climbing
And sat here upon this ledge
Stopped looking up, stopped looking in
And wandered blindly towards the edge

The guru he called down to me
Be careful lest you fall
You may not have made it all the way up here
But its better than not climbing at all

So I took another tiny step
Then another two or three
Rested whenever I felt the call
And surrendered all the fear inside

The guru he called down to me
Be careful lest you fall
You may not have made it all the way up here
But its better than not climbing at all

Before I knew it I was by his side

and I said what I came to ask
He said you found your answers there below
Upon that rocky path

Blessing

There's a day you come
And a day you'll be gone
But our journey of growth
Carries on and on

You can be you and I can be me
We don't have to fight
After all it may not matter
Which of us is right

Through every problem's cracks
I see a blessing glow
Every storm cloud makes a rainbow
And hopefully we know

That there's a blessing here
Whether it's time to give or take
There's a lesson here
And some growth to make

If you're a blessing or a lesson
Doesn't matter which is true
Whichever you turn out to be
I'll try to be a blessing to you

Ascend

As you close your eyes
Know this is not the end
It's just now is your time
To ascend

That grudge you have carried within you
It's time. You can just let it go.
Don't worry that you'll be forgotten
Enter the cosmic flow

Feel the love of the ones who knew you
Take a moment to whisper goodbye
Take a look at all you've created
And ready yourself to fly

Good old day

I got my bare feet swingin in the grass
an old grown-over hay bale under my ass
Out behind the big old barn
that used to be red

Crickets chirping in the evening cool

our old friend Bobby acting a fool
And the cowboy hat that used to be yours 

perched upon my head

Today is a good old day
Music fire friends and beer
Soon the memories'll fade away
So lets enjoy it while its here 

Another good old day

Jimmy brought that big ass truck
Hit the mud, he's already stuck
Let's grab some chains
and drag him out of there

Susie throws another log on the fire
Then another and then a damn tire
Somebody better catch that girl
fore she catches fire to her hair

Today is a good old day
Music fire friends and beer
Soon the memories'll fade away
So lets enjoy it while its here
Another good old day

Jessica

She's never been the kind of girl
With buckets full of easy luck
She gets by mostly on her nerve
Her confidence and pluck

Her unrealistic dreams
Are the right fuel for her soul
and the really really long shots
Well, they're the only kind she throws

She's a modern but old fashioned gal
From here in Kalamazoo
And if that ain't luck then I don't know
what lucky means to you.

Her standards go for miles & miles
Kinda like her legs
And the boys they come from all around
You can almost hear them beg

She still ain't found what she's looking for
But she's okay to wait
Mr perfect lost his watch
He's coming but he's runnin late

She's a modern but old fashioned gal
From here in Kalamazoo
And if that ain't luck then I don't know
what lucky means to you.

She's a modern but old fashioned gal
From here in Kalamazoo
And she makes her luck and she takes that luck and
makes her dreams come true.

Gold

As time flows by
our greatest fear
may be that we're not guaranteed
the golden years

We may not have a way
to grow leisurely old
So perhaps we should turn
today to gold

If today was gold
what would you forgive
who would you love
how would you live?
If today was gold

But for some even a golden day
may just be out of reach
If we only had a golden hour
Would we learn what it had to teach?

If this hour was gold

what would you forgive
who would you love
how would you live?

If this hour was gold

An hour can be a lifetime
In our very busy minds
Unless we open up our eyes
We'll meet the sunset blind

So if just this moment was gold
what would you forgive
who would you love
how would you live?
If this moment was gold

Cube farm

Gray cubicle walls surround me
Like a fog rolled from sea
till I cannot see
A way out

Fluorescent lights flicker weak and thin, They add a
sexy greenish tint to my skin
And I cannot see
My way out

The only thing growing in this cube farm 

is discontent
I was young when I first started here
Now I wonder where the years went

But better the evil you know
Then to be forced out alone
And so I cannot see
A way out

This situation isn't fair
But I hear its tough out there
And I'm afraid I'll never see
My way out. 

Bitter pill

C G Em F

She says that mine
is not to wonder why
But do or just die quietly
Well that ain't quite my style.

So I do what I can
to serve her needs
But I try not to lose my nerve
Or forget to stand up for me

Am D

I help her from the hospital bed
Over to her potty chair
Steady her while she tells me
how she wish't I wasn't there.

C G Am

I got her medication straight
But she seems to be sneaking
...a bitter pill

Get better soon mama
I can't take a whole lot more
Its wearing me down, sorting the stacks 

and making paths through every floor

Get better soon mama 

so I can shed this thicker skin
So the insults while I care for you
Can't find a way to slip in

The bible says honor your mother 

that I am sure of... And I'm
glad because duty and honor is a
whole lot easier than love.

I got her medication straight
But she seems to be sneaking
a bitter pill
She seems to be sneaking
a bitter pill

Roll tide

It's bright and sunny outside today
But ever since she went away
It's been very cold and empty inside
And I've found there's no warm place to hide

The seagulls, they soar in the open breeze
The sand crabs run funny and free
But somehow it's just cold and empty inside
And it pulls me in just like the tide

So roll tide, roll tide
Drown all these memories
Roll tide, roll tide
Cleanse me of reality

The press of the wave as it crashes down
Seems like it must weigh a million pounds
Don't send a life raft or boat for me, my friend
This is just how it was meant to end

Roll tide, roll tide
Hold me in your embrace
Roll tide, roll tide
Till I can't remember her face

Namaste

Is it too much to ask for
To know and be known
Or is it just our destiny
To be born and to die alone

Six billion people running
This tiring human race
So few who seem to want
The respite of warm embrace

Slow down. Stop. Rest a while
Tell me who you really are
The finish line won't move a bit
Its not a shooting star

If anything the star is you
Moving quickly, burning bright
Its strange how you can fail to see
By the glow of your own light.

But perhaps instead I'll share my light
So you can see your way
And I can use the light you lend
To get me through til day

Is it too much to ask for
To know and be known
Perhaps it is better
To show and be shown

The light that's within us
No matter how pale
The light that's within us
Which never will fail